


All Apologies to Edgar Allan Poe

by The_Bentley



Series: Five Hundred Word Challenges [7]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Annoyed Aziraphale (Good Omens), Aziraphale is So Done (Good Omens), Aziraphale's Bookshop (Good Omens), Bookshop Snake Crowley (Good Omens), Bored Crowley (Good Omens), Boredom, Halloween, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Inspired by Edgar Allan Poe, M/M, POV Aziraphale (Good Omens), POV First Person, Poetry, Scary Crowley (Good Omens), The Arrangement (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-20
Updated: 2020-10-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:28:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27125869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Bentley/pseuds/The_Bentley
Summary: It's October and Crowley is in search of someone to scare but Aziraphale is not going to lift a finger to help him towards that goal.  The GO parody of Edgar Allan Poe's "The Raven" nobody asked for but I wrote anyway.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Series: Five Hundred Word Challenges [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1885723
Comments: 22
Kudos: 83
Collections: SOSH - Guess the Author #07 "Big Spooky Fan Me."





	All Apologies to Edgar Allan Poe

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Незваный гость (All Apologies to Edgar Allan Poe)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28956729) by [Ayescha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ayescha/pseuds/Ayescha), [WTF Good Omens 2021 (team_Good_Omens)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/team_Good_Omens/pseuds/WTF%20Good%20Omens%202021)



Once upon an evening long, my bookshop closed, the customers gone,

Over many a first edition dusty I so longed to pore —

While I read books all entrancing, interrupted by a tapping,

Suddenly of one rudely rapping, rapping at my bookshop door.

“’Tis that demon,” murmured I, “who is knocking at my bookshop door—

Only him and nothing more.”

My annoyance thusly grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,

“Crowley,” said I, “Why have you arrived at midnight I implore;

But the fact is I was reading, and on my door you came beating,

And so rudely you came knocking, knocking at my bookshop door,

I was certainly sure to have heard you.”— I yanked open the door;—

A demon there, nothing more.

“What pleasure owe I this meeting?” said I to him upon our greeting

Lightly in stepped the demon of alliances made years before

Not the least greeting made he; not a second paused or stayed he

But did swagger to ancient couch in office beyond bookshop door

Then perching upon said couch in office beyond my bookshop door

Slouched and sat, and nothing more

Sighed the demon, sitting slouched on the cushions of my ancient couch

“It is October now,” said he. “This month I’m finding quite a bore 

And thus I say if I dare I want to find someone to scare.”

Sighing I quietly muttered “We went through this the year before 

An angel am I and will not help you just like the year before.”

The demon said “Nevermore?”

“Be that our understanding foul fiend!” I replied, quite demanding

“Get thee behind me, with this I’ll not help you, ask me no more!

The Arrangement includes requests not like the one you have sought

Leave my quiet unbroken, leave this place, walk out of my door

Take yourself from that ancient couch and take yourself out of my door

We’re discussing this no more!”

Standing up to bid au revoir, the demon walked out to his car

Out my window I did look as off he drove in mood quite sore

Though I sat at my desk trying to read, nary did I succeed

For deep within my shop came crashes like shelves landing upon the floor

I sprang to my feet frightened my steps falling across the floor

Precious books on shelves no more?

My books were fine, nothing missing, but shadows at me came hissing 

A ghastly shape came quickly towards me across the well-worn floor

My heart fair leapt into my throat then some details I did note 

Those ebony scales I knew quite well from Eden's Garden lore

“You’re not fooling me, my dear, taking a shape of Eden's lore.

Do that again, nevermore!”

**Author's Note:**

> My iambic's probably off but this was hard and I'm no poet.
> 
> Comments will be responded to when the game is over and author names are revealed on 27 Oct.


End file.
